Change and Loss

Sean Lucas made an interesting point in Sunday School this past week. He was discussing "change" and how change can cause stress and conflict because it causes loss. That statement has amazing implications in my life the last few weeks. Change of administration is a loss on my part as far as the election goes. It was a very emotional loss too. The Obama win for President was quite an emotional and gut-wrenching experience for me - perhaps too much so in some ways, but it was, just the same. As time has passed, the emotion has subsided, but I remain wary of what is to come. There are many people around me, with many different opinions as to what is going to happen on many policy fronts, and I have to say that I suspect that NO ONE, including Obama himself, really knows how his administration is going to play out. I do think that over the next four years, I may become even more of a political junkie and advocate - continuing to be educated and knowledgeable.

Change and loss took on another form in my family this past week. My aunt, my Mom's sister, passed away. It was very sad to say goodbye to Aunt June - though we were not always close, mourning her loss so close in time to my Mom's loss has been a difficult thing. Truly, the loss of the two sisters who were at the heart of this family certainly causes loss and causes change.

Winners and Losers

As I anticipate what's going to happen in our country in the next 36 hours, I am saddened as I come to realization that there's a good chance I'm going to be on the losing side in tomorrow's elections. I realize that people need to vote their conscience, and there are many people who think that a full-fledged Democratic government in Congress and the White House is exactly what our country needs. Part of my sadness is the fact that I am convinced, that in many ways, my family - all three generations - will be worse off in four years than we are now. I am saddened when I think of the ways our country could potentially change in the next four years - both economically and spiritually. I am saddened that someone with so little substance has been able to hypnotize the public and convince the public that "change" is good - without explaining to the public exactly what that change is.

I confess that part of my sadness comes from my ego. It's hard to be on the losing side after having been on the winning side for eight years. Although many would say that the last 8 years have been terrible, I am glad that we have had the leadership we had. I can't imagine how different the aftermath of 9/11 would have been if we would have had different leadership.

At the same point in time, I am again becoming discouraged by the work I am doing here every day. It seems that this feeling of malaise is covering a wide spectrum in my life. I am feeling again that my work and my efforts have very little effect on the defendants and victims that I am dealing with. I am discouraged by the response of the judicial system and the different players within it. Here, as in our nation in general, we're latching onto the victim mentality - a mentality that even though we are the agents of terrible acts - acts that hurt others - that somehow, a pat on the back and a couple drug treatment sessions are the "punishment" that we should get. That somehow, we can blame our troubles on our diseases, and not take responsibility for the outcomes of those diseases.

It's a discouraging time - nationwide and in my own life. I am reminded that even in, and sometimes especially during, these discouraging times, I am to remain thankful and to be reminded of the blessings I have. I confess, my thankfulness has been shallow. Also, it's important to be reminded in these times that our salvation and comfort doesn't come at the hand of politicians or even at the hand of our work and its' results - but at the hand of God. Now, if I can just remember that......